I like pants. And other inane things.

I like pants.

Jam is good.

Sometimes I stare at the sun.

Ooohhhh. . .bubbles.

Hi doggy. Woof!

Walk to store.

Games are fun.

The ball is blue.

And round.

And bouncy.

Kitty has a rough tongue.

Would you like to play?

Run away!

I read. A lot. Usually at least one book a week. I recently read Tim Ferris’s The Four-hour Workweek. It was great validation. You could say that I’ve been on a mini-retirement for 18 months now.

I save a lot and invest wisely — in that sense I’m very conservative with my money. But I also like to enjoy my career and personal life. So I work hard, and then take time to detox or work on something I enjoy. In that sense I’m very aggressive with my money. It was nice to read a bestseller where someone espouses the same ideals.

Thanks to Amazon’s “you might also like” feature, I also purchased Your Portable Empire.

Pointless drivel. Easily summed up in four to five pages. I sincerely feel dumber for having read it. I kept expecting it to get better, but it got more pointless as the chapter numbers crept higher. I’ve got brain cells trying to shake off the fog as I write this.

Midway through the book, we began to be treated with 1-page chapters — really, 1 page — that said something like “I’m drinking coffee and typing this chapter on my laptop. Ain’t life grand?”

Gee, Kenny, look at my shiny new bike!

So I submit to you my outline for my new book project. If you can help me get it published, I’ll give you half the royalties. I’ll fill in the gaps obviously, but I can’t promise much. Apparently the bar is set very low these days anyway.

Here’s to our good fortunes.